ELDERS ARE SO WEIRD

ELDERS ARE SO WEIRD

Over time, the meaning of weird shifted to encompass more general notions of destiny, fate, and magical and supernatural influences. However, weird took a left turn in Western culture. When spoken, weird portrays something or someone as strange, creepy, or unusual – in other words, weird.
 
People or things considered weird will not be invited to engage in conversations where relationship, family, group, or executive decisions occur - decisions that shape their future. And that's where elders must be to make the most significant difference. 

THE DILEMMA
 
Elders can access other planes of reality beyond what the thinking mind can comprehend. Nearly all spiritual, philosophical, and metaphysical traditions contend the existence of these other planes of reality. And people in both the East and now many in the West have direct experiential knowledge of these other planes of reality.
 
These planes are different levels or dimensions of existence beyond the physical world that the thinking mind can perceive. Elders reach these other planes through meditation, yoga, self-reflection, contemplation, and some with psychedelics. And these planes of reality are as real as the reality you wake up into every day.
 
When the thinking mind encounters an elder who occupies these other planes of reality, planes the thinking mind cannot recognize, it leads directly to the interpretation that elders are weird.
 
Although incredibly powerful and essential for cognition, the thinking mind has some unexamined limitations and restrictions that keep hidden what's behind and beyond their thoughts.
 
Know the thinking mind for what it is, neither patron nor benefactor. The thinking mind is its own private institution. Becoming an elder whose abilities go beyond the thinking mind would be seen as weird.
 
THE THINKING MIND
 
The thinking mind is programmed to think "about" things. Thus, it has to turn everything into an object, including oneself. The mind automatically creates a duality when it thinks – him, her, them, or it over there, and me over here.
 
The thinking mind can't help itself. It can only do what it is designed to do: think "about" things. Since it can only think "about" things, the thinking mind has difficulty relating to awareness, faith, and the existence of the soul since none are things.
 
No wonder the thinking mind finds elders strange; since faith and the divine exists for elders, not as a caricature or concept. Given its design and function, is it any wonder the thinking mind would make God into a thing?
 
The thinking mind always comes with its locked-in prejudices and biases. The thinking mind believes it already knows. The thinking mind's job is to make itself right. And when it's wrong, it's right about being wrong. It's a closed-loop system.
 
The thinking mind is the judge and, most often, the jury, passing sentences on others and oneself. But elders learn to be the neutral party in the courtroom, not the judge, jury, prosecutor, or defendant. That is another reason the thinking mind finds elders a bit weird. Elders don't get involved in courtroom drama.
 
Although the mind thinks it has unlimited processing capacity, the thinking mind has a finite processing capacity. Koans in Zen Buddhism, a riddle that the thinking mind cannot solve, are used to interrupt the thinking mind and to see what's behind it.
 
In our work, we use two kinds of yoga, Hatha Yoga and Jnana yoga, to alter how people relate to their thinking minds. In both of these yogas, you can witness the mind in action. You get off the field and into the stands. You watch the thinking mind's offense and defense on the field. And after a while, you can call the plays before they happen. That is enlightenment.
 
The thinking mind pays little attention to the impact of emotions on what it thinks. But try thinking clearly when angry, afraid, upset, or heartbroken. Elders understand emotions are always there, exerting their influence – if they go unrecognized, they persist.
 
Elders let their emotions be present without being possessed by them or trying to suppress them. They have emotions; emotions do not have them. And elders get very nuanced about their emotions to gain greater awareness of them when they occur. They become the subject of their study on emotions. "Ah, here's that jealousy one again."
 
Elders do not need to process their emotions because they recognize their impermanent nature. Like waves on the ocean, they arise, crest, break, and make their sounds but soon disappear back into the ocean.
 
The ability to let emotions be, makes elders seem weird when they don't get upset, angry, defiant, or resistant. Not that elders lack emotion, they just don't become their emotions. Elders don't get sucked in.
 
Having survived their many troubles and tribulations, elders are not shocked or overwhelmed by today's crises and conflicts. Having repeatedly seen how things fall apart, elders have also witnessed the uncanny ways in which nature and humanity find roots of renewal.
 
An elder enhances renewal. The thinking mind has trouble understanding selfless intention: Selflessness and the mind, oil and water.
 
The thinking mind grasps and clings to keep its importance. As the Buddha stated in his noble truths, 1) Life is suffering. And 2) the cause of suffering is clinging and grasping to your thoughts.
 
Thoughts about the future. Thoughts about the past. Thoughts of fantasies. Thoughts of opportunities lost. Thoughts about mistakes made. An unending spool of thoughts. Nearly all of those 60,000 thoughts you have daily live in the past or the future.
 
An elder focuses on being in the present moment, which requires much more catch-and-release of thoughts. Minimize grasping and clinging, create greater freedom, and allow accessibility to higher wisdom. Thoughts become visitors, not permanent residents.

These are also the very qualities that make an elder an elder. These qualities make elders worthy of being heard, appreciated, and respected. These qualities live embedded in their words, implicit in their speaking, allowing them to be heard as a sage.

If you see the following qualities expanding in your life, be careful, you may be on the path to becoming an elder.

• Empathy and compassion are present for others. These feelings stir more deeply. These feelings have you thoughtfully consider how to make a difference for others. You understand their needs, concerns, and feelings because you are now conscious and aware of your own.
• 
  Vision and purpose are emerging as your pistons of power. You are all grown-up about the reality you are dealing with in the world, and, at the same time, you are on the tip of commitment, ready to heed a call of duty. The paradox between reality and possibility has much less tension than ever before.

• Diversity and inclusion are opening wider. You find yourself more accessible to hearing different voices, listening more with curiosity than judgment. You hear new perspectives and insights. No need to prove yourself smart; you know it doesn't matter anymore.

• Transparency and accountability. You are now making decisions after thoughtful consideration. You know, impulse gets you in trouble. Thoughtful consideration includes conversations with a few trusted people because you're no longer invested in being right. Not hiding makes you invincible.
• Accountability is giving your word and being your word in action. Your word is your vow.

• Collaboration and cooperation. You're noticing that people around you are more empowered. Collaborative power is the ability to create power in others. Power doesn't follow the rule of thermodynamics. It does not occur in a closed system and is not constant. It is getting people to mutually commit to a future so a collective voice is spoken. It is this voice that invokes real change.

• Being Human and humanity gives you access to the ultimate power plant. You find yourself more accepting of your humanity – flaws, weaknesses, stupidities. You have far fewer qualms about being who you are. You have given up needing to be somebody else. You now have legitimate concerns about humanity's future and want to make an impact.

• Adaptability and flexibility are more available. You can unstick yourself more rapidly. You're more masterful at applying power in the right places at the right time in the right way. You're not stuck in doing it "the" way, "your" way, or the" right" way – all past based. You know the solution always lives in the future. 

• Tenured thinking and patience are part of using power more wisely, not releasing it too soon, streaming it when appropriate, and being highly aware of its long-term effects. You understand things take time, and the best work is done at the right time, not your time. 

• Ethical and moral decision-making are showing up more and more in your everyday considerations. You recognize these moral and ethical signals moving you to a higher plane. And you recognize that ethics and morality are now loud voices overriding the previous thoughts of what's in it for me.